Kim Kardashian may have memed herself this week after accidentally offending countless people with her insensitive private island tweet
, but she’s in luck because on this week’s episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians
(Thursdays at 8pET on E!), Khloe got coronavirus. How’s that for a distraction?The episode starts out with Kim’s most relatable moment ever: as a harried mom trying to figure out how to unexpectedly homeschool her kids. “School was cancelled. They’re only allowing online classes. What are we going to do with our kids for a month?” Kim nervously asked Scott, who looked equally concerned. Because this footage was shot back in March, they had no idea just what they (and the rest of the world) were in for. “This is going to be tough for a lot of people,” the Lord mused. He was not wrong.
Meanwhile, an exhausted Khloe stood with her forehead resting on Kendall’s kitchen counter during an Architectural Digest
video shoot, complaining that she felt hot and sick. Khloe had a mask and gloves on, but Kendall looked ready to set her house on fire in order to get away from any potential germs. A producer saved the day by suggesting that Khloe go home and soon she was in bed with aches and pain, a sore throat and a fever. This did not bode well but somehow, her physician seemed comfortable making a home visit in close proximity without a mask (it’s hard to remember that we did stuff like this back in March).Khloe got a COVID-19 test as Kim squirmed in the background, offering both her support and a healthy dose of mild panic. Ever the optimist, the doctor quickly commented that it probably wasn’t coronavirus but Khloe could choose to isolate from her family as a precaution. Fortunately, she did self-isolate because, as we now know, it totally was coronavirus. Oh, and Kanye tested positive, too! (If this wasn’t a deadly pandemic, now would be a good time for Kovid-19 or Koronavirus jokes but let's not.)At this point, the Kardashians were super worried about Khloe, who was getting sicker by the day. Fortunately, Tristan was able to move in and care for True while Khloe was in isolation, bringing Khloe food and even celebrating his birthday in his ex/maybe-girlfriend’s home. If Tristan had ever had a chance to redeem himself, this was it— and in all honesty, it seems like he stepped up and did a good job holding things down while Khloe recovered.[video_embed id='2066538']WATCH: Khloe Kardashian’s scary battle with COVID-19 [/video_embed]Meanwhile, Kim was living in total chaos with four children and no help from Kanye, who was self isolating in their master bedroom. We saw her attempt to homeschool and build cardboard before walking to Kris’ house to grab a bag of Cheetos. She also stole a bottle of hand sanitizer from her momager, because even Kim K couldn’t get her hands on that stuff back in March. Sorry, Kris—desperate times.Later, Kim awkwardly attempted to make boxed macaroni for dinner, saying it was like being in college again (Kim didn’t actually graduate from college, but this comment holds up). The SKIMS founder was thrilled when the children liked her “cooking,” but seemed as exhausted as anyone with four kids would be during a pandemic. "It’s really extremely chaotic,” she admitted. Yeah, it really is. Kanye better get over the COVID ASAP because solo parenting four children is no joke, even when you live in a mansion with its own frozen yogurt machine.Back at Khloe’s house, the COVID-positive sister was struggling with severe migraines, chills, shakes and body pain. “I’ve been throwing up, it’s just been bad,” she told Kim over video chat. Khloe was forced to miss the birth of Malika’s baby boy, Ace Flores, and was having a hard time being separated from daughter True, who thought she was away on a trip. As she watched from a window as Tristan played with True outside, it was obvious just how sad she was. “Not being able to be with your own child really sucks. She doesn’t know it’s for her well-being.”
The rest of the KarJenners were figuring out their lives under quarantine as the governor of California issued a stay-at-home order. Kris was in tears worrying about her mom, 85-year-old fashion icon MJ, who was hilariously insisting on microwaving all of her food to “kill germs.” Corey was being Corey and very little was said about Kanye, who obviously made it back to health in order to run for president.Kourtney and Scott decided to quarantine together with their kids at Kris’s Palm Springs house and Kylie popped on screen to deliver a monologue on how hiding her pregnancy prepared her for lockdown. “I made every day fun and took that time for me, whether it was taking a bath or doing a face mask or reading a book,” the young billionaire opined. “There’s things we can do to help each other through this.” Got it—books, baths and face masks. Consider it done, wise Kylie.After over two weeks of isolation, Khloe was finally on the mend. “Let me tell you, that shit is real,” she shared in a hoarse voice. “We’re all going to get through this. If we follow orders, it will be okay.” After encouraging people to take the virus seriously, she ended with a dramatic, deep whisper. “May God bless us all.”Watch Keeping Up With The Kardashians
Thursdays at 8pET on E!.[video_embed id='2064913']BEFORE YOU GO: Kim Kardashian under fire after posting private island pictures during pandemic [/video_embed]