Only good mojo for JoJo on ‘Bachelorette’ premiere

(Photo by Rick Rowell/ABC)

Emily Zupnik,

The new season of “The Bachelorette” premiered last night and it did not disappoint. The men were hot and full of personality (read: drama), which proved for a solid start to the season.

The night started with a montage of JoJo falling in love with Ben during last season of “The Bachelor.” We would have preferred to not relive that heartbreak again, but it did make us that much more excited for JoJo to do her thing. Here are some highlights from the show: 

Best Dressed: JoJo

What we missed most about JoJo: her outfits. What we missed least about JoJo: the envy we feel over her outfits

She looked unbelievable the entire night. We may have a larger crush on her than we do the guys. 

Best Introduction: Luke

Our boy Luke came out on a unicorn, paying homage to JoJo’s entrance on Ben’s season. He also gave JoJo cowboy boots later in the night and what girl doesn’t love a guy who buys her shoes?

Best Instant Connection: Jordan

The first guy out of the limo was one of our standouts Jordan. His promo video of him being thoughtful in the rain shows us he is not only attractive but also sensitive. His opening line to JoJo about his parent’s marriage was short and sweet and made us believe that true love can be found on reality TV. 

Added bonus: his butt

He obviously won the first impression rose. JoJo said they had an instant connection, which we believe because we also had an instant connection with Jordan through our screen. 

Best Drunk Guy: Daniel 

Daniel the Canadian got plastered, got naked, and yet somehow still got a rose.
Our favourite quote of the night did come from him though: “Have you been following the internet the past few months?” DANIEL SHE IS THE INTERNET. 

Best LOL Moments: 

•    Random Grant promised JoJo he won’t fall in love with two girls on this show…Grant did someone not explain this process to you?
•    JoJo kept telling guys they looked good and was not afraid to very obviously check them out. It was refreshing and something we may try on the subway today. 

Top Picks: Jordan, James Taylor, Luke, and unfortunately Chad

•    Jordan is going to go far, the promo showed us that he professes his love for JoJo and like we said before: Olivia Munn could be her new sister-in-law. So why wouldn’t you pick Jordan? Or at least take him to the hometown round?
•    James Taylor the bro came out singing. SWOON. He was that funny guy in high school that girls friend-zoned but is now cleaning up. JoJo really likes him, but we sense heartbreak for them both down the line. 
•    Luke was a platoon leader in Afghanistan. He is obviously some sort of hero and we love him. If he doesn’t win he would be a great Bachelor.
•    Some of the guys got bitter really fast. And by guys we mean Chad. But JoJo said she has a thing for “bad guys,” and if by bad she means terrible well then Chad is perfect for her!

Not going to say we predicted this, but we kind of did. Good luck JoJo.