The 'uninspiring and overrated' Meryl Streep and more of the Oscars' biggest winners and losers

Yes, technically there are only a select number of winners and a whole lot more losers when the Oscars are said and done, but as they often say, it’s not whether you win, it’s an honour just to be nominated. Well, that’s easy for the winners to say, at least. 

The awards have all been given out (some twice), but now it’s time for us to hand out our own awards for winners and losers of the 59th Academy Awards. We don’t have any gold trophies, but we could probably find a few participation ribbons laying around.

Winners
‘La La Land’

Damian Chazelle’s musical romance “La La Land” about an actor and a jazz musician chasing their dreams in Los Angeles may not have had a clean sweep for all the 14 of its nominations, but that doesn’t mean its crew went home empty handed. The film took home six Oscars, including Best Original Score, Best Song, Best Director and Best Actress for Emma Stone.

Damien Chazelle’s big night out

Speaking of “La La Land,” every acceptance speech for “La La Land” included a huge thank-you to director and writer Damien Chazelle, who at 32 became the youngest Best Director winner in Oscar history.

'Moonlight'’s moment

“Moonlight” was already having a stellar night before Best Picture was announced, with Barry Jenkins and Tarrell McCraney taking home Best Adapted Screenplay and Mahershala Ali winning Best Supporting Actor. Throw in its surprising win for Best Picture (and by surprising, we mean “La La Land” won, had a quick take-back, then “Moonlight” won), and it signaled a necessary shift away from #OscarsSoWhite. 

The ‘highly-overrated’ Meryl Streep

No one likes calling people losers more than the President of the United States, which is essentially what he called Meryl Streep after her Golden Globes speech in January. Oscars host Jimmy Kimmel didn’t let the opportunity to poke fun at the world’s greatest actor go by. When is Meryl not a winner? Never. 

“We're also here to honour that actors that seem great, but aren't. Of all the great actors here in Hollywood, one in particular has stood the test of time for her many uninspiring and overrated performances...Meryl Streep has phoned it in for more than 50 films over her lackluster career.”

Auli’i Cravalho is ‘Moana’ 

Sixteen-year-old Auli’i Cravalho’s first professional voice acting job was her starring role in Disney’s “Moana.” The newcomer kicked off another first by not only attending the Oscars, but also performing for Hollywood’s biggest names, plus a few hundred million viewers. And the pressure didn’t even stop Cravalho from keeping her cool when a flag hit her in the head. Now that’s a heroine. 

Black top, white bottom

Emma Roberts and “Manchester By The Sea Best Actress” nominee Michelle Williams both rocked the black top, white skirt dresses, looking stunning on the red carpet and during the live show.

The colour gold

Emma Stone, Jessica Biel, Dakota Johnson, Leslie Mann and Nicole Kidman were all winners for doing their best impression of an Oscars statue.

‘Hamilton’

This Academy Awards may celebrate film, but Broadway paid a visit to L.A. for the Academy Awards. From Seth Rogen checking “performing a song from Hamilton at the Oscars” off his bucket list, to Lin-Manuel Miranda rapping onstage alongside Auli’i Cravalho, the spirit of Alexander Hamilton was alive in the Dolby Theatre.

Losers
Justin Timberlake’s haircut

Justin Timberlake is one of the most famous pop stars and actors in the world, but that doesn’t mean we have to be on board with all of his hair decisions. We think his 1998 ‘NSync cornrows may have been better than this buzz cut.

Jimmy Kimmel’s joke about O.J. Simpson

Jimmy Kimmel hit a few tone-deaf moments throughout the night, especially when it came to his puzzlement over “complicated” names. As for his joke about O.J. Simpson, Kimmel found the line that the audience at the Dolby Theatre wasn’t ready to cross.  “O.J., you get an extra slice of bologna on your sandwich tonight,” said Kimmel before narrating his own bomb. “Almost halfway through the broadcast, the crowd turned on Kimmel with an absolutely tasteless joke about our beloved O.J.”

Matt Damon

We don’t think Matt Damon is a loser, but host Jimmy Kimmel isn’t exactly a Jason Bourne fan. The two celebs checked in on their ongoing feud and yes, they’re still pretending to hate each other and yes, we’re still loving it.

Anyone who thinks bus tours are lame

Sure, not every bus tour ends with a trip to the Academy Awards, but we now have proof that it’s a possibility. 

President Trump

The 45th President of the United States was the inspiration for much of the night’s content, including host Jimmy Kimmel’s opening monologue and a unanimous statement by all the Best Foreign Language Film nominees to speak out about Trump’s immigration policies. In the words of Trump: “Loser."


 
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